Back Up Plan


Recently I went off on one of those tirades about always having to be the one to plan a date and always having to find the babysitter and how nice it would be if I didn’t have to plan every damn thing. I admit I was beyond PMS and had just finished about 7 consecutive loads of laundry, homework with the kids and making dinner. No excuse really, but shouldn’t we all get taken care of at least once every 10 years or so? My husband decided he was going to act on my crazy behavior and decided to surprise me by ordering hockey tickets. I do appreciate hockey and our old hometown team (Red Wings) would be playing the Caps so it seemed like a good idea. We won’t be able to speak to each other over the roar of the fans and will probably be criticized for cheering for the Wings, so it really isn’t that much different from being home with the kids.

Well, it seemed like a good idea until he realized he couldn’t find a babysitter. I am one of those people that plan; I not only have a Plan B, C and D, I also have a contingency plan and a disaster recovery plan. Call me crazy, but I like to have the least amount of stress possible in my life. My husband talked to the two people he could think of to babysit for us and then came to me to me to tell me the surprise he was planning was not working out well.   Good news is that he tried, bad news he is now the proud owner of two tickets that he paid way too much for.

I have now managed to talk my parents into driving 550 miles here to babysit so we can go to the hockey game. They are amazing people, I have to say I love my kids, but I don’t know that I would do the same for them. People always say, “Of course you would”, but I am a tad on the selfish side and not so certain of that. I am so grateful to have my parents and who knows, maybe some of their goodness will rub off on me?

So back to the hockey game, I am excited and it will be fun, but I have gotten to the age that anything that requires mass transit and large crowds irritates the shit out of me. Back in our younger days, we would head down to Detroit to see a band play and have to walk 2 miles from our car to get to the venue, we would be crammed with drunken people dancing and bumping into us and we would be singing and dancing right along with them. Those WERE the days, literally, because I want nothing to do with that now.

Ok I am 40 now and what I did 15 years ago almost seems like a punishment. If I am going out on a “date” with my husband I want a chance to break out my best clothes and heels (replacing my usual Under Armor and New Balance with added support). I don’t want to walk anywhere other than to my seat and I want a taser so if anyone gets too close or invades my personal space I can give them a zap. Not a strong one, I’d say about a third of the normal strength would do the trick and leave me feeling comfortable.

I also want to be able to go sit in a bar and talk to the person I came with, not the stranger next to me. I don’t care where you are from or what team you are rooting for, I don’t even care who wins, there is a bartender that gets paid in tips, make him your best friend! I have gotten to the point where I start making stuff up now. So, where are you from? Russia. Wow, you don’t have an accent. That’s because I am from the non-accent part of Russia. Oh? Hey, if they are going to irritate me, I have the right to make them look dumb.

I am looking forward to the game and the quality time with my husband. I am even looking forward to the hangover I will most likely have from drinking overpriced draft beer. Heck, I may even miss the kids a tad. So go Wings, go Caps, go whoever, I don’t really care who wins because Saturday is about ME!

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