Jesus Bunny


I have to admit that I have always been a bit confused about how the whole Easter Bunny thing came about.  I understand Easter is in the spring, when flowers bloom, the weather turns nice and we begin to see God’s creatures running about.  But can someone explain to me exactly what Jesus being put on the cross to die for our sins and then raising from the dead has to do with a 6 foot bunny that delivers jelly beans and chocolates to our houses while we sleep?  Did I miss something, did Jesus rise dressed as a bunny rabbit?  I wasn’t there so I don’t know and there wasn’t any technical devices to record it, so we  have to go by what we have been told.

Even if you are not the least bit religious or have your own beliefs, you have to admit that the Easter Bunny situation is odd.  I am also confused by all the FB posts and articles about Easter not being about chocolate bunnies and dying eggs, meanwhile every church I passed between Michigan and Virginia was hosting an Easter Egg Hunt this weekend and the public is welcome.  There is that fuzzy line separating church and state and I guess it gets even fuzzier with egg hunts and Jesus.

My family will be celebrating Easter this weekend the traditional way, and it will go something like this.  We will start off with the dying of the eggs.  This should be a fun family activity, but it’s not.  We will huddle around the table telling the kids to be careful every 15 seconds and then we will wind up yelling at the kids for spilling the dye all over the table because they like to throw the eggs into the dye instead of using that stupid wire thing that Paas gives you.   One child will somehow get to dye one more egg than the other child, even after I have prepared an even amount and separated them, and then the first meltdown will begin.  Then one or two eggs will have to hit the floor and I will be pissed off that I have to clean it up and my yelling will be the beginning of meltdown number two.  Lastly, the kids will try to apply those effing stickers to the eggs and none of them will stick, I will be named the worst mom ever and wind up telling the kids to get out of my face for 30 minutes, there ending into meltdown number three.

Of course we are going to go to the neighborhood egg hunt, where every resident and their “friends” show up to grab 500 eggs for 1,500 kids.  My husband and I will be pissed off before we even get out of the car; at each other, the kids and the association for putting on this cluster fluff!  I especially love when the parents show up pissed off about the age limits and protest, even though Jimmy is 13 he’s small for his age and they pay the same association dues as the rest of us so he is getting his eggs too!  This is the kid my husband gets on his radar and just waits for him to get close so he can trip him or have one of the kids bump into him and spill his basket.  Meanwhile, I am following my five year old around, who has actually gotten 3 of the 500 eggs but dropped them out of her basket every time she bends forward to pick up a new one.  When the hunt finishes, 60 seconds after it has started, she looks at me when she sees just one egg in her basket and tells me it’s my fault.  Of course it is, isn’t everything?

There is a positive side to all this Easter stuff.  This is one of the few days a year when the kids will do their best to be well behaved because we do have the Easter Bunny on speed dial and can call to cancel his visit at any time.  They will even sleep in their own beds without protest, because we have informed them the bunny can’t come unless they sleep in their own beds the entire night.  Judge me if you will, but I am not the one that started the whole Jesus Bunny thing, I am just being a good parent and playing into it and if I get a couple of perks out of it then I am taking them!

Happy Easter, blog at you next week!

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